Why I Go Solo | The Gift of Traveling Alone

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A big jump

Hai Van Pass, Vietnam

In April of 2017, a 22 year old me bought a one way ticket to Bangkok, packed some bags and flew to the other side of the world… alone. 

It was just like that, those were the very first steps in my journey abroad and little did I know what was in front of me. I couldn’t have foreseen the passion I would find in travel nor the life changing experiences that would take part in shaping who I am today. 

Six years ago I made that decision, to immerse myself in a place I had never been before. I took a leap and in many eyes, it could be better considered a huge risk. I had only rough ideas of what to expect and the only thing I knew for sure was that Asia was surely different from little ol’ Royal Oak, Michigan. 

So I embarked, I jumped, I went for it. I went solo and through all my travels and experiences, I have developed a unique preference and love for traveling alone.

Could you do it?

What do you think? Does the idea of what I did excite you or does it make you nervous? Maybe it stirs up a bit of both. 

Regardless of where anyone is going, one thing's for certain- another country is a big ol’ bag of unknowns. I know, the great big and bad unknown. Some of us are more comfortable with the idea of the unknown than others and that's okay, expected even- we’re all different people. I do get it, traveling to a new country is like taking the unknown and injecting it with steroids. There’s no singular pin point for the unknown, it spreads out, twists and turns into a web of an all encompassing and brand new experience.

Absolutely everything and anything will be different, from the subtle and minor to the clashing cultural differences that scream in your face. The food will taste different, the air- full of new smells and the streets- a maze to get lost in. Even the clothes the locals wear look different, you just might stick out like a sore thumb and the language they speak, who knows what anyone is saying?

Sa Pa, Vietnam

An opportunity

All of this change could evoke anxiety and you’re not wrong to react this way. If it does make you nervous, I’d like to challenge you to look deeper into your emotions, past the logistics and the fear of the what-ifs. I reckon if you take a step back, all of these differences might not look like impossible challenges to face. Instead, they could look like a whole new world to discover, a true adventure.

I believe we all have some natural capacity for curiosity and wonder, and those innate desires can lead us into something spectacular, something bigger than ourselves. 

I believe curiosity can offer us an opportunity to connect with the world around us, but there’s a catch. A chance to connect, only if we are brave enough to reach out for it. After all, shouldn't our experiences make us feel alive? We’re here for a blip in the grand scheme of things, don’t take a passive backseat to it all, hop in front and make things happen!

Take it to the next level

Now that we’ve painted the picture of going abroad, let’s take all the colors of the unknown, the overarching ‘different’, and add one more thing- YOU and only you. You can jump into this sea of brand new and you can do it alone. 

Cebu, Philippines

Now I bet some of you are thinking, “I couldn’t do it’. I often hear these words come out of my mother’s mouth, though usually that’s after she hears some story about more food poisoning or some logistical nightmare that ended up in a 24 hour series of very unfortunate events. I’ll admit to the amount of stress I cause my mother… sorry mom. But hey, I get it.

I recognize that traveling and traveling the way I do isn't for everyone, and I respect that. I would only argue that you actually can do it alone, it’s whether or not you want to. Maybe you should try it out?

And if you have gone solo, maybe you can relate to some of what I’m saying.

Empower growth

It’s natural to have nerves or concerns about the things that you simply know nothing about. For me, a lover of the unknown, that’s what I fell in love with. The process of showing up to a place that’s foreign in its entirety and over time, learning it, understanding it and finding familiarity inside of something that I once knew nothing about. This is what I feel many of us become addicted to, this process of making a foreign place, in some shape or form, a home. 

I feel that I grow and expand with every new country, culture and experience. And when I do this alone, every single aspect of navigating this new place is an opportunity for me to learn. Every sensation is heightened and in an impactful way, heavier. I learn new skills, I find out what I am capable of and ultimately, above all else,

I build a relationship with myself; I learn to trust myself.

When you’re alone, every interaction, hiccup or success is on you. You begin to realize that in the end of whatever happens, you can handle it and you’ll figure it out. I’ve learned to trust my own judgment, my abilities and even forgive myself for all those mistakes. 

How much time have you spent with yourself? Some of us go our whole lives never having experiences alone, never eating a meal on our own, spending quality time with ourselves or creating a memory that belongs only to us. 

We may be alone but one can never be lonely when immersed in the natural world.

Mt. Kinabalu - Borneo

Never really alone

For those who still have some fear or anxiety, I’ll let you in on one big secret- you’re actually never really alone. Everywhere you go people will be there, in a shared experience or space, to assist you or lend a helping hand if you need. When it comes down to it, someone will be there and if help isn't what you needed, then a stranger will be there to share a smile with or maybe even an awkward laugh because neither of you really know what the other is saying.

Especially when alone, I find that I feel more connected to what’s around me, more in-tune and aware of where I am. And with this, I am more likely to reach out and interact with strangers and locals around me. I just feel truly present in whatever moment I’m in.

Honest truth

Let’s be transparent. Traveling, especially alone, isn’t sunshine and rainbows all the time. You will be tested, possibly stressed or even a little scared in a situation. I’ve had my fair share of stresses, mess ups and sketchy run-ins. And yes, you may feel stings of being ‘lonely’, especially in the beginning. The good news is that the more you travel on your own, the more confident you become and with that, more accustomed to those emotions.

I have been in moments where I felt ‘alone’, where I felt like sharing. Moments where I looked upon a sunset or out into the open sea and I wished to share it with someone I love. I’ve felt this many times amidst my solo traveling, but the important thing is that it’s simply one part of it. None of this could ever outweigh what you gain. Not once would I have rather been there with someone than not have been there at all. Experiencing these feelings or the tougher parts of the journey doesn’t take away from the adventure. I wouldn’t trade my solo adventures, good and bad, for anything- I wouldn’t have them any other way.

Go outside your comfort zone

I’m sure you’ve heard this before, everyone has. Something like ‘the magic happens when you go outside of your comfort zone’, right? While it may be a bit cliché and overused, I believe it to be true and when it comes to traveling, it kind of serves as a basis in my very own mantra. Through every hard hike or uncomfortable situation I tell myself:

You have to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.

I’m sure I’ve said it before on Deep Rooted and I’ll keep saying it because this is what I lean on. Every uncomfortable interaction or experience I’ve had has taught me something- whether it’s patience, understanding, problem solving or physical grit, there’s something to take away. 

When you’re abroad you will be uncomfortable and that's okay! It will happen again and again, so much so you’ll get used to it, and if you can learn to welcome the discomfort then everything becomes a new opportunity to grow - and every small task becomes an adventure.

You do you hun

I know that what works for me, may not work for others. While I’m hoping to inspire you to take the leap and go solo - I’m understanding of the fact that we all have our own approach. Start small, spend some time alone doing the things you love. You can enjoy a day trip in your home city, take yourself out on a date, go somewhere new for the weekend. You don’t have to go big the first time you go solo. This is what I did but maybe I’m crazy? The point is, these are my experiences and I’ve loved my journey alone. I want to share what traveling alone has given me because it’s only strengthened me as an individual and as a woman.

Mt. Pulag, Philippines

I fear many of us have lost touch with doing things on our own, for ourselves - maybe we’ve never gifted ourselves a new experience or a real adventure. I think a lot of the time, people love to talk themselves out of things. 

All I’m saying is try it out, keep an open mind and you just might love it as much as I do.

• Madeline

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